I opened my
eyes. It was afternoon the next day and I was on my bed, still with my
clothes on. I tried to remember how I ended up in my bed with clothes on
after such a hot bath with Cynthia but couldn’t. Was I that drunk? Then
I tried to remember the events that took place the previous night and
could only remember to the point where I lost contact with the real
world. Apparently, I had been sleeping and dreaming all along.
Arrrrrrrgggggggg!!!!
Just then
Cynthia came in to check on me. As soon as she saw me she started
laughing. I didn’t understand what was funny to her. I was just
analyzing her and reminiscing on the dream I just had. I then imagined
it was real and laughed. Seeing that I was laughing, Cynthia laughed out
all the more. I then gave a mischievous smile and said ‘you’re lucky
that the entire shower thing was just a dream. If not, you wouldn’t be
laughing right now’. ‘What shower thing?’ Cynthia asked. ‘Never mind’ I
said. Wait a minute, were you dreaming all along? Don’t tell me you’ve
been dreaming’ Come on; tell me, what was it about?’ Cynthia enquired.
I’ve never seen someone smiling and licking his lips as though kissing
someone while sleeping’. I was shocked to hear that. “Was I doing that?”
I asked. Of course you were. I came in to check on you and found you
doing that so I left. I came again some moments later and found you
doing the same thing. I was flabbergasted”. I thought you were going
nuts so I wanted to call for an ambulance when I heard you………
I didn’t wait
for her to finish her statement. I interrupted her and told her it must
have been the effect of the alcohol I had the previous night. I tried
to wave that away as though it meant nothing to me but I was ashamed.
Cynthia continued with the statement she was making before I cut her in.
“I wanted to call for an ambulance when I heard calling my name. I
thought you had seen me come into your room and wanted to say something
to me but I was wrong. You laid there on that bed calling my name
passionately and I got curious as to what could make you call my name in
that manner while sleeping”.
“After a
while you stopped but didn’t wake up. I left for a little bit only to
come back and see you awake and saying I wouldn’t be laughing if it all
wasn’t a dream. What happened?” Were you dreaming about me?”
I didn’t know
what to tell her anymore. I had never felt so humiliated my whole life.
I was ashamed and shy. In fact, if there was a plane heading for
Nigeria at that moment, I would have joined it without a second thought.
But this Cynthia sure knew how to cheer me up. She had correctly
guessed the kind of dream I had and how humiliated I felt about it. She
drew near to me smiling, pated me on the back and said; “I’m sorry to
have made you have so much drink. I never knew it would have such strong
effect on you”. “My bad” she said. She blamed herself for everything
and made it look like such dreams only came to people under the
influence of alcohol. There could be some truth in that anyway. Don’t
you think?
I freshened
up afterwards, had lunch and went for a work. I couldn’t stop thinking
about the all that happened in the last six hours. I stopped by a park
to take some air. There it seemed like everyone were in pairs. Only a
few people were solo, and I was one of them. The sight I beheld pleased
me and at the same time made me feel lonely. Right then I remembered
Ogechi big time. I missed her a lot. I remembered back at Enugu, I never
felt lonely. No moment was boring. There was always fulfillment back
then. But in America, things were different. Imagine what happened last
night. I had so much to drink, and that made me have a weird dream. I
couldn’t imagine that happening if I was with Ogechi. I remembered the
days when we had little money and no fame, watching movie with my laptop
was more pleasurable than going to the movies. Squeezing ourselves to
fit into a sixteen inches foam for a night was more comfortable than
sleeping in a family size bed in five star hotels for eternity. Trekking
from campus to our residence was more enjoyable than riding in a
Lincoln Navigator to the white house. Eating together in a local
restaurant was more refreshing than consuming the delicacies of royalty.
We all strive to attain higher heights in life but sometimes it could
be very lonely and miserable up there. I missed Ogechi but I didn’t know
if she missed me too. If she did, why hadn’t she called?
I went back
home pretty late and mate Cynthia sitting just outside the house. She
didn’t look happy. We got talking and she told me she wasn’t happy about
me leaving the house to an unknown destination without her knowledge.
Cynthia had grown so fund of me that she wanted the both of us to be
like five and six. She was worried sick about me just because I got out
of the house without letting her know my where about. It was obvious
that Cynthia saw me to be more than a friend to her cousin. She saw me
as her man.
I wouldn’t
blame her for that anyway. I can remember she told Lin I was her fiancé
and I didn’t deny it. At the movie premiere I told some people she was
my woman. All that coupled with our time out together was enough to
suggest to her that I was reciprocating the feeling. Right now it was
time to face reality. Cynthia loves me and I know that. I have feelings
for Cynthia but I wasn’t sure it was love. It could be lust because my
heart belonged to Ogechi, but that was about to change.
All the while
I had closed my heart on Cynthia because I didn’t want to fall in love
with her because I was in love with Ogechi. But after a while without
any sort of communication with Ogechi I contemplated on giving Cynthia a
chance since she was the one present with me and was showering me with
all the love in the world. I didn’t know what was going on with Ogechi
anymore. So I decided to let go off the feelings I had for Ogechi and
start something with Cynthia. But then, I thought I should give Ogechi
one more shot before proceeding to do anything I might regret in the
future. I called Ogechi’s line twenty times daily for the next three
days but couldn’t speak with her because she was so busy. Busier than
how I last knew her to be. She had grown to become a superstar. How I
wish it was I and Ogechi living like I and Cynthia were.
Since I
couldn’t speak with Ogechi I was ready to make Cynthia my girl for real.
I didn’t consider her age anymore. After all, she looked as young as
young as Ogechi, even though she was older in age. I started planning on
how and when to ask Cynthia to be my girl. She had expected me to ask
her that long before now but I didn’t. I bet she wondered why I hadn’t
asked her for that long. Maybe that’s why she told Lin I couldn’t
express myself before women. She even thought I was a virgin. I knew
Cynthia was gonna go gaga the day I asked her to be my girl, and I was
gonna ask her. I guess Ogechi had also found herself some nice guy over
there. Well, best of luck to the both of us.
I asked
Cynthia out on a date one day. It was the day I planned to ask her to be
my girl. We went to a Chinese restaurant and ordered for some Chinese
meals. Getting adapted to eating with the chopstick wasn’t easy for me.
Cynthia had no problems with that because she had been doing that
overtime. The Chinese restaurant was my idea, so it was somewhat
embarrassing not being able to properly use the chopstick. Cynthia
didn’t care. Even if I peed in my pants, Cynthia wouldn’t feel ashamed
of me. All those made me go crazy for her the more.
It took a
while before I could properly make use of the chopstick and thus, the
main purpose of the date was delayed. Finally, I could properly make use
of it and that part was over. It was time for me to drop the bomb. I
didn’t just want to ask her to be my girl. I wanted to make that day a
very memorable one. More memorable than any good time I ever had with
Ogechi in order to completely get rid of any feelings left for Ogechi. I
may have summed up courage to leave Ogechi for Cynthia, but that wasn’t
likely to happen without some emotional stress. So I decided to make
every part of my day with Cynthia a very romantic one before proceeding
to the main subject.
I had
succeeded in making Cynthia smile and laugh and enjoy her time out with
me. I made her feel secure with me. Even if I didn’t ask her to be my
girl, nothing would have stopped her from believing that I was in love
with her. If I said nothing that night, Cynthia would think that I am
the kind of guy that wouldn’t easily profess love, but would rather act
it. She believed beyond every iota of doubt that I was in love with her
because of the things I said to her and the way I acted at that
restaurant. But then, I still had to break the silence. The time came
for me to utter the word that would change everything; my life, my
purpose, and probably my destiny. Do I really need to do this?
To be continued.