The movie
premiere finally came to an end. I and Cynthia made sure to say goodbye
to a good number of people before leaving. Cynthia drove the car. Midway
home she made a turn that didn’t lead to her house. Where’s she going? I
asked in my heart. I said nothing to her because I didn’t want anything
that would ruin the mood I had succeeded to get her into by pronouncing
her my woman. I knew she took it seriously. But I didn’t bother to find
a way to make her understand I wasn’t really serious. I was exhausted
already and wanted to rest badly. In addition, I have been proclaimed a
celebrity in the presence of dignitaries who have identified with me and
expect to watch my films and listen to my music. That became a problem
to me. So whatever I had said of Cynthia didn’t bother me. All I was
thinking about was how to live up to the expectation of those people who
saw me as a celebrity.
Cynthia drove
us to a lone street with noise and the sound of music coming from just
one out of the many buildings on that street. She drove to that building
and stopped.
‘Where is this?’ I asked.
‘It’s a club’ Cynthia replied softly.
I could tell
she was in high spirit and wanted to let it out in that club. I don’t do
clubs, even in Nigeria but since we had already gotten there I had no
choice. We stepped out of the car and entered inside. There were lots of
people and this was about 10pm. There were no chairs there. Only some
stools at the bar for a number of people who wanted to have a drink.
Even at that, the stools were not sufficient enough as some ended up
standing to have their drinks. It didn’t bother them.
The club
house was a large on, yet we could barely make it through from the
entrance to the bar. ‘Two glasses of vodka’ Cynthia ordered. ‘Alright
ma’am’ the bartender responded and left to serve her order.
‘Why two glasses? I asked. You know I don’t do alcohol’
‘Don’t give me that! She said. Tonight is special.
‘Do you mind telling me what’s special about the night? Because I don’t seem to have a clue.
‘We’re celebraaaaating’
‘Really? What are we celebrating if I may ask?
‘Friendship I guess.
Oh yeah, friendship. We could have done that back at home, just you and me.
‘Perfect!
Cynthia screamed. We’ll definitely continue at home. In fact, I’ll serve
the best part of the celebration for last’ she said grinning lustfully
at me’
‘Here’s your order ma’am, the bartender said as he pushed two glasses of vodka towards us’
‘Thank you handsome’, Cynthia said.
Cynthia
grabbed one glass of vodka and emptied it into her mouth and squeezed
her face like one who tasted something bitter. She handed the other
glass to me and I was about objecting when she flung her left arms
around my neck and put the drink in my mouth. I refused to open my mouth
and take the drink or say anything because if I tried to say something
she would just throw the drink into my mouth. But what she was doing to
me became like a drama to most people in the club and little by little
their attention was on us. When I saw many of them turning to watch us, I
opened my mouth and took the drink so that all that more undue
attention would be averted.
After I took
the drink the people in the club gave us a round of applause. Na wa for
Americans oo. Imagine such a thing happening in Nigeria, no one would
even notice it, let alone paying attention to it. But there it attracted
some degree of celebration.
Cynthia
refused to let go off me. Instead she ordered for two more glasses of
vodka and gave one to me in the same manner. She continued like that
until we both had five glasses while being watched by over 50% of people
in that club. What we did became like a show that interested everyone
and made them want to stick around to see how it ends.
She then
dragged me to the dance floor for a dance. I’m not a good dancer. In
fact, I’m not a dancer at all. But even if I said that a million times
to Cynthia, she wouldn’t hit the dance floor without me. At this point,
she wasn’t the Cynthia I had always known, neither was I the Jesusboy
Ogechi had always known. I bet Ogechi would get on her knes and start
praying for me if she knew the condition I was at that point in time. I
followed Cynthia reluctantly to the dance floor telling her I didn’t
know how to dance. Cynthia didn’t give a rat ass about that. She was
like a lioness that had laid hold of best prey ever. She was way beyond
logical reasoning and the only language she understood was FUN.
Although I
was trying to get her to understand that I didn’t want to hit the dance
floor with her, I was enjoying every bit of what she was doing. Five
glasses of vodka turned things around. I was in another world indeed. I
eventually got to love the attention the people in the club were giving
us and I began to dance. I wouldn’t know if that thing I did was called
dancing but I sure moved to the rhythm of the music. I could hear them
hailing and clapping from time to time and that spurred me up all the
more.
As time went
on I couldn’t seem to get a clear picture of anything again,
nevertheless, I didn’t give anyone a dull moment because the crowd
didn’t stop applauding, hailing, and laughing. Maybe I did a few Mr. Bin
stuff in there. I wouldn’t know. But I know I was drooling at Cynthia
while doing what seemed to me like dancing. She wiggled and wiggled that
I began to entertain wild thoughts I hadn’t entertained in years. Mehn,
this Cynthia is one hell of a girl. You need to meet her.
The light
that gave life to my sight shrunk until it was no more. Even the sound
of noise and music gradually reduced until everywhere became silent like
a grave yard. Then I heard Cynthia saying; don’t sleep on me little
boy. She was smiling, she was drooling, and she was grinning. I opened
my eyes to realize that she was trying to lead me to her car and head
back home. My eyes were fixed on her lips. The allurement of her lips
made me return the smile, grin and drool. I could tell she was screaming
the words she was saying to me but it sounded to me like she was miming
to nothing. I tried to keep myself awake but as soon as Cynthia moved
the car and the cool from the factory fitted air conditioner of the car
made contact with my sweaty skin, my eyelids hugged each other again and
I lost contact with the real world.
Many things
happened after I lost contact with the real world. Things like Cynthia
driving me home, two of her maids assisting me to my room since my feet
couldn’t carry me, taking off my cloths and leading me to the shower to
have my bath and rid myself of the smell of alcohol. You’ve got to be
kidding me. I thought those things only happen in China. After they put
me in the shower and turned it on, I felt like an eagle that just
hatched when the water touched my sweaty skin. The two maids stood there
staring at me as I played under the shower like a kid who wasn’t aware
of what it meant to be naked before people. It was a good thing they
didn’t take off all the cloths I had on. They left me with the tommy
Hilfiger boxer I had own. I bet they thought I was going to dismiss them
and continue the rest by myself but they probably had the biggest shock
of their lives when they saw me bath with my boxer on. That’s why they
stayed back to observe me closely. They must have believed I had lost my
mind. Not that I was really aware of what I was doing anyway. I had
five glasses of vodka working wonders in my system.
Next thing I
heard was Cynthia’s voice scolding her maids for staying back to watch
me have my bath. She took it really personal. She was high, so she
wasn’t acting like she normally would. Five glasses of vodka was also
working wonders in her system. The maids tried to explain to her that
they stayed back in case I happened to need anything since I was not in
my right frame of mind. ‘How dare you say he’s not in the right frame of
mind? Cynthia asked with extreme annoyance. ‘Now let me show you what
it means to not be in the right frame of mind’. She drew near to them
and gave them two slaps, one for each of them. I just sat back in the
shower and enjoyed the drama. When I saw that Cynthia was blowing things
out of proportion, I stepped in. I wonder how I managed to know she was
blowing things out of proportion.
‘I told them
to stay back’ I said. I really needed someone around so I stopped them
from leaving’. ‘Really?’ Cynthia asked. Come on J, you should have
called on me instead. She turned to her maids and said; ‘Now get out of
here you two. The maids left in a hurry, then Cynthia stood there
watching me do whatever I was doing. I wish I knew what I was doing. But
whatever it was, it was really funny because I saw Cynthia laughing
over and again at me. Maybe I was playing the clown.
After a while
she stopped laughing and started advancing towards the shower slowly.
After three steps she stopped and took off the fancy roller she used to
pack her hair and then flipped her hair. Chai! It was such a lovely
sight to behold. Again she took another three steps and stopped,
unzipped the gown she wore from behind, pulled it off her both arms and
let go of it. The gown dropped at once to the floor covering only her
feet while the rest of her remained exposed. After another three steps,
she stopped again and did something else more fascinating than the
former. At that point, I lost my mind completely and would have cursed
anyone who dared come between me and that temporary insanity. I sat on
the floor of the bathroom watching her as she kept blowing my mind after
every three steps until there was nothing left of my mind to be blown.
You won’t believe this. She got into the shower and stood right in front
of me unclad. I don CRAZE! She wanted to take a shower with me.
‘This had to be it’ I thought. ‘I have come to the end of the road. There’s no escape this time’.
I closed my eyes like a soldier who was giving up in a war he was determined to conquer, and then suddenly!
To be continued.