I looked at the ‘stuff’, It was a little piece of paper. I
opened it and saw a phone number written on it. I
smiled and nkechi asked me why I was happy, I told
her that I just got a million dollars credit alert on
my phone and we laughed it off. Actually, chioma’s
number was equivalent to a million dollars to me.
I and nkechi were really good friends but I wasn’t
thinking about sleeping with her though I knew she
was a bad girl (though with a good heart too). she
was really funny and fun to be with but she had ill
manners.
She had a fiance and their relationship was serious,
but I still could have had $ex with her if I wanted
to. We used to talk nasty like that. Truth be told, I
don’t understand women. No one ever will. She
always used to jokingly tease me to buy her a drink
and I had kept postponing it for weeks.
It wasn’t really serious sha, we used to laugh about
it. Now, she brought up the drink issue again:
“David, you’re going to buy me a drink today. Now
that you have big money in your account”
“Nooo, I was just joking o.”
“Never. I won’t listen to any of your excuses today.
You have been promising me this drink for over
three weeks now.”
Now I remember how this drink issue started. It
was when I came back from a short travel and
nkechi asked what I brought for her.
I told that I didn’t buy anything but that I would
buy her a drink later. It’s been weeks since then. So
today was payday. For some reason, I was feeling a
little happy with myself so I gave in.
We went to a nearby bar and I ordered for drinks.
We chose a hidden bar where no staff or student
would spot us.
I ordered for a bottle of beer but nkechi ordered for
malt. I was kind of surprised so I asked her:
“Why did you order for malt? Take something better
na. Anything. I will pay.”
She laughed.
“See David sha. You are a big boy o.”
“Na God na. Abi you nor dey like big boys?”
“Really, I don’t want you to spend your allowee
(corper’s salary) on me. We earn the same sum so
why want to spend yours? It’s unfair na. You are not
the kind that I love spending their money.”
I just pause dey look this girl wey dey always make
demands whenever she receive or make calls from
men. Sometimes she dey tell me about her magas
sef. Na wa oh.
See why I don’t understand women?. All the
bugging for months was just for a bottle of malt?.
However, I learnt an old lesson: a woman who
really likes you never encourages spending, no
matter how rich you are.
After the drink, we went to our seperate ways to
our homes.
That night around 8pm, I brought out the piece of
paper chioma gave me and saved her number (the
most important number in my phone at that
moment).
I called her three times but she didn’t pick up.
Phone communication was very essential if I
planned on getting any student cuz that would help
keep my affairs private from the eyes of my
principal and her spies (whoever they were).
I was worried that maybe chioma didn’t have a
phone and had given me her mum’s number. That
would ruin things.
Later that night, I got a phone call around 11pm. It
was chioma:
“Hello sir. Good evening”
I never still understand English sef. Is it supposed
to be ‘evening’ or ‘night’?. Sha na dem sabi.
“Good evening. How did you know it was me?”
Abi this girl na winch? Because her nyash be like
wetin dem pump for marine kingdom o.
“I knew you would call. I just knew.”
“Wait, wait. How did you know?”
“I knew na. The way you look at my….”
Then she began to laugh. No, this wasn’t funny. I
was supposed to be a coded guy. I hope say I never
cast o. But then again, who wouldn’t call? I bet
even the Pope will. Lol.
“Look at your what? I didn’t hear you”
“I didn’t say anything”
“If you don’t tell me I would drop the call”
Women love men who are stern at unusual times.
Experiences thought me that.
“Ok. I said you’re always looking at my bum-bum”
I heard her perfectly the first time but I just wanted
to hear it again. Whoops!! Naim be say her dey
there. No time for formings, make I talk my mind.
“Actually, I like your a$s. But don’t you think its too
much for you? Some girls don’t have at all”
She dey laff. The tin don sweet her die. Girls like
‘whining’.
“Sir please stop. Its not my fault na. Am I the one
that created myself?. You’re talking about me, what
would you say if you see my elder sister?”
Holy fvck! Are you kidding me?!. Anything bigger
than yours is suicide.
“Really? Where is she?”
“Lagos”
Damn! The headquarters of everything is in Lagos.
Even a$$.
“Ok. So when would you have the time to come and
visit me?”
“That will never happen. I’m sorry.”
I lost balance, I didn’t expect this reply. I composed
myself again.
“Why do say that?”
“I don’t go to people’s houses”
“So how do we get to spend time. I mean privately”
“Private time doing what?. There are places we can
meet instead of your house.”
I laughed to make it look casual but really, I was in
heavy confusion. This girl is black and white at the
same time. I hate complications, life’s too short.
“Ok. What kind of places do you want us to meet?”
“Tantalizers or any other fast food restaurant in
town”
I dropped the call immediately. That would shock
her. Sometimes that’s the best way to pass your
message across.
Na thunder go fire her! She feel say I be maga abi?
Her fada!.
I put my phone on silent. Lay down on my bed.
Thinking. I Thought about all the women who loved
me unconditionally and somehow my ego was
boosted.
There are over two billion women in the world, so
loosing one means nothing.
No one can turn me into a maga, I don’t care if her
a$$ is bigger than twin towers. Instead, I accept
defeat. I put on my sound system, played rass kass
“it is what it is” and kept it on repeat. One of
deepest rap songs I ever heard. Yeah, I’m deep with
it. I needed some soul food.
So Here we go again. Hip-hop: Love of my life.
I forgot about chioma and slept. Tomorrow would
be a better day.
*next day morning*
I woke up. Few minutes later, I checked my phone,
saw eleven missed calls and one text message.
Chioma had called me eleven good times and sent
me a message.
I opened the text message….
WATCH OUT FOR PART 24